var d=new Date();
var chains=new Array(31);
chains[0]="I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean.
-G. K. Chesterton
"
chains[1]="Holding onto anger is like grasping onto a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else. You are the one who gets burned.
-Gotama Buddha
"
chains[2]="I will have nought to do with a man who can blow hot and cold with the same breath.
-Aesop
"
chains[3]="When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.
-Albert Einstein
"
chains[4]="To do anything in this world worth doing, we must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in, and scramble through as well as we can.
-Sydney Smith
"
chains[5]="A mind, like a home, is furnished by its owner, so if one's life is cold and bare he can blame none but himself.
-Louis L'Amour
"
chains[6]="Keep cool and you command everybody.
-Louis de Saint-Just
";
chains[7]="To do anything in this world worth doing, we must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in, and scramble through as well as we can.
Sydney Smith
";
chains[8]="Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.
Leonardo da Vinci
";
chains[9]="We enjoy warmth because we have been cold. We appreciate light because we have been in darkness. By the same token, we can experience joy because we have known sadness.
David Weatherford
";
chains[10]="Holding onto anger is like grasping onto a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else. You are the one who gets burned.
Gotama Buddha
";
chains[11]="We must beat the iron while it is hot, but we may polish it at leisure.
John Dryden
";
chains[12]="When you're hot, you're hot; when you're not, you're not.
Flip Wilson
";
chains[13]="Do it now. It is not safe to leave a generous feeling to the cooling influences of the world.
Thomas Guthrie
";
chains[14]="Those who trust to chance must abide by the results of chance.
Calvin Coolidge
";
chains[15]="Hell must be isothermal; for otherwise the resident engineers and physical chemists (of which there must be some) could set up a heat engine to run a refrigerator to cool off a portion of their surroundings to any desired temperature.
Henry Albert Ben
";
chains[16]="When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.
Albert Einstein
";
chains[17]="What dreadful hot weather we have! It keeps me in a continual state of inelegance.
Jane Austen
";
chains[18]="Neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.
Herodotus
";
chains[19]="If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.
Harry Vaughan
";
chains[20]="Heat and animosity, contest and conflict, may sharpen the wits, although they rarely do; they never strengthen the understanding, clear the perspicacity, guide the judgment, or improve the heart.
Walter Savage Landor
";
chains[21]="One cool judgment is worth a thousand hasty councils. The thing is to supply light and not heat.
Woodrow Wilson
";
chains[22]="A jewel's just a rock put under enormous heat and pressure. Extraordinary things are always hiding in places people never think to look.
Jodi Picoult
";
chains[23]="When a man is wrapped up in himself, he makes a pretty small package.
John Ruskin
";
chains[24]="Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
George Carlin
";
chains[25]="California is the only state in the union where you can fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.
William Claude Dunkenfield (W. C. Fields)
";
chains[26]="Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust and hostility to evaporate.
Albert Schweitzer
";
chains[27]="The world belongs to the enthusiast who keeps cool.
William McFee
";
chains[28]="Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up our minds to walk boldly through them.
Orison Swett Marden
";
chains[29]="A word to the wise ain't necessary; it's the stupid ones who need the advice.
Bill Cosby
";
chains[30]="The Pittsburgh Post Gazette is reporting on a new phenomenon called wrap rage. Where people injure themselves trying to open difficult plastic packages with sharp objects. It goes on to say that according to a report, British researchers blame wrap rage for more than 60,000 injuries in that country. Okay, let's see, if England's population is 60 million, and they had 60,000 injuries, and our population is 300 million, how many injuries would we... hold on, I can do this. Um, let me just get my brand new graphing calculator. [Gets out a calculator in a wrapped plastic package, and tries to open it] This, uh, this'll only take a second here. [Can't open it] Let me get that... [Tries to bite it open, but can't] Okay, I'm gonna lose that battle right there... let me get that. [Tries to use a pencil, but it breaks]
Stephen Colbert of The Colbert Report
";
document.write(chains[d.getDate()-1]);